Dear Husband:
Life sure has changed over this last year.
Our late nights have transformed into early bed times. Spontaneous date nights have now fizzled away, leaving us with fewer outings and a lot less alone time. My tight jeans, make up and dolled up hair has now been replaced with yoga pants, messy buns, and an unwashed face. Lacey bras have been traded in for plain nursing bras, and let's not even talk about the underwear you have to wear post-partum!
I have changed, we have changed, but I still see you.
Sometimes I catch myself staring at you, remembering the time we went ziplining in the white mountains, or the night we spent at a Rob Zombie concert. I watch you hold our daughter and rock her to sleep as I recall the nights we spent drunk together in Mexico just one year ago. I remember the way you made me feel when our relationship was new, because you still make me feel that way today. Safe, loved, appreciated, SEEN.
I will admit that it has been difficult to remain calm somedays. The house is dirtier than its ever been - laundry and dishes pile up endlessly while you work 60+ hour weeks and take classes to support us. We both get little sleep and emotions run high, because WOW hormones are wild after childbirth, but I still see you.
When I was pregnant I laughed at the thought of our marriage changing as I held your hand in the car. You simply just smiled and said "just wait and see". You knew already what I didn't know, since you have an 8 year old. "Things will be different" you added as you smiled at me. And they are.
But despite all the changes we have been through, despite my random bursts of tears or anger, despite the unkempt look I've now nailed down - you're still you. So, thank you, for living through endless versions of me since we've brought our daughter home. Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on, my therapist, my friend, my comedian...all I've needed.
And remember, even on the hard days, I still see you.
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